Dilbert 1
Dilbert: As usual, I worked until midnight last night, mom.
Dilbert’s mom: Well, at least you made some extra money.
Dilbert: I don’t get paid for overtime
Dilbert’s mom: Well, at least it was important work.
Dilbert: Not really.
Dilbert: My boss made me change my “powerpoint” slides, but the changes make them worse.
Dilbert’s mom: Well, at least you’re prepared for your meeting.
Dilbert: It was cancelled.
Dilbert: But that’s okay, because the project isn’t funded anyway.
Dilbert’s mom: So… you worked for free to worsen a presentation for a meeting that won’t happen for a project that doesn’t exist?
Dilbert: YUP.
Dilbert 2
Boss: We have too many empty cubicles, it frightens our customers.
Boss: Each of you will adopt an empty cubicle and decorate it to appear occupied.
Dilbert’s colleague: My imaginary employee will be a Frenchman named Phil de Cube.
Dilbert: Nice.
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Dilbert 3
Boss: Dilbert, put together a team to decide who’ll be on the strategy council.
Dilbert: You want me to form a committee to create a committee that will produce a document that will be ignored?
Boss: No, it’s a team to create a council.
Dilbert’s colleague: Can I be on the team that ignores the document?
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Dilbert 4
Dilbert: I’m grossly underpaid. I want a raise.
Boss: Oh, Dilbert, Dilbert, Dilbert.
Dilbert: What? What? What?
Boss: People don’t work here for the money.
Boss: They work here for the challenge!
Dilbert: If challenges are more valuable than money…
Dilbert: Why don’t you give me your money and I’ll give you my challenge?
Dilbert: Well?
Boss: I must kill him before he infects the others…
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